Saturday, August 15, 2020

The Write Education and Understanding: A Time to Embrace

Hey #JustWrite!! We are in the month of new beginnings (#8 represents a new birth, new creation or new beginning, from Biblical Mathematics, Keys to Scripture Numerics) and I can see now that most of us have had to embrace several new beginnings this month with virtual school, new employment, home ownership, entrepreneurship, paid partnerships/collaborations, and of course writing books. Throughout this pandemic, the conversation that has come up consistently has been the new beginning of healing. All of us, whether black, white, etc. need healing but specifically it is past time for us in the black community to embrace our need to dissect our wounds and trauma in order to make sense of why we have our beliefs and views on situations. The truth is that many of us operate based off of unhealed traumas. I've said this in numerous spaces that writing became a source of therapy for me which led to my healing journey when I couldn't express what was happening to me. Because of that, relationships were hard to navigate at times. I thank God for showing me things and helping me to identify things within myself and my experiences that have carried me into personal and business matters. As a young black woman, I know that it is important for me to be healed in order to move forward and change the narrative. Many of us are living in false narratives as adults because as children we were never relational and affirmed, two things that help shape our emotional intelligence. We have believed every truth that's presented to us because we as a people do not take the time to educate ourselves and talk through the traumas and hurts that have been subjected to us from previous generations. I picked up on this in college as I was navigating different emotions on who I was as a young black woman. I was always identified as someone's daughter, sister, friend, student, etc. but I had to really look at who I was and why I responded to certain things the way I did. Where did it come from? It wasn't until I started to listen to my family members share their traumatic experiences from childhood and their responses to it which helped me to see why I was searching for healthy relationships and the need to be affirmed. My family had a deep wound of unhealthy relationships and lack of affirmation and other forms of trauma. My prayer throughout the years was always for my family to be healed by acknowledging the pain, seeking forgiveness, and moving forward. It's the only way to really be authentic in our relationship with ourselves and others.  Recently on Twitter I shared the following tweet: "The world knows about PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) but what about this PTSD? (Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome) Here is a documentary about it." The documentary I'm referring to is a complement to this month's book club selection: Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome: America's Legacy of Enduring Injury and Healing by Dr. Joy DeGruy. You can view it below: 


In this video, Dr. DeGruy touches on how we as a people are still suffering today due to what has happened to our ancestors during slavery. When we as a people don't acknowledge the suffering and abuse of blacks in this country, then the false narrative about black people is further perpetuated in society. Many in our communities don't want to admit it but we tend to treat our own the same way whites treated blacks during slavery especially in the corporate setting (clinging to titles/positions instead of character building due to lack of being affirmed in childhood, the "I own you" "I run this" mentality when one is abusive in power, etc.)  We also see this in our families with how we handle situations with our loved ones especially with our children. There's always a power struggle instead of the need to understand and be understood. I think about the moments I've had throughout the years working with learning communities that were predominantly black. Because of their trauma, the majority of the students didn't care for any education. They wanted to share their hearts and experiences. That's what they lived through and were connected to. The students I encountered wanted to be heard and know that someone cared and not be so concerned with meeting a status quo or pushing a twisted, systematic agenda. We've spent years focusing so much on doing things by time that we've missed the relationship factor. This is just one example of so many layers to this trauma that it's overwhelming and an ongoing detriment to us. Please watch the video along with reading the book. For those of you reading the book, there will be an upcoming book discussion on Facebook with Kim and I on August 25th at 7pm. If you're able to join, please come ready to engage and learn. I look forward to the upcoming conversation as the ultimate goal is to communicate, educate, and advocate for our communities as thought leaders and scribes. As I've said numerous times in previous blogs, it's time for us to embrace each other, while educating and understanding each other's stories. Will you join us?





In His service,



Lequvia Ousley